Adam and Mark have been together five years, and they committed to one another a long time ago, before a legal wedding was even a possibility.
When they realized they had the chance to make it official, they envisioned a summer wedding at their vacation home in Sebastopol. But when Mark found out his aunt and uncle would be in San Francisco in April, they quickly changed their plans so Mark’s family members could be present, and in just five short weeks planned an April wedding instead, right at their home in San Francisco.
They admit some of their favorite memories from the day were commonplace things, such as playing with their dogs in the morning, helping set out the food (especially the rainbow-colored Peeps), and conversations with their family and friends.
But there were two favorite moments that weren’t so commonplace – receiving their boutonnieres (“That moment really crystalized that we were getting married, and I got emotional,” Adam says) and sharing their first kiss as a married couple. The first kiss is a big moment for any couple, but it often carries more weight for same-sex couples who did not grow up assuming they would someday be able to marry someone.
“For years, as a gay man, I never thought marriage would be a reality,” Adam says. “So I, like many others, created a different reality – one where you tell yourself that a committed relationship is just as strong and good and equal to marriage – and it IS and can be. Then the option of marriage became a legal reality. When we decided to get married, I was happy but did not really understand how it would make me feel. Certainly I still felt all the love I ever did for Mark – but I was surprised that I also felt proud, honored and equal. It is still difficult to describe how good I feel when I get to list Mark as my spouse on any document.”
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